Locked Out

Not too long ago, Grant and I had a little mishap when leaving Arby's. I always unlock the car, help Grant get in his seat, put my purse and keys in the front seat and buckle him in. On this day, I followed the same routine and shut the back door and attempted to open my door. That is when I discovered the problem. Somewhere in the process, I had managed to hit the lock button on the remote. My purse, my keys, my phone AND my child were in the car, and I was locked out. I knocked on the window and hollered "Grant, get out of your seat" (which he has NEVER even attempted to do). Grant, who had a chocolate shake in his hand, had no interest whatsoever in helping me and responded with a sweet "no" as he took another sip of his shake. I pleaded a few more times with him to no avail. He was too enthralled with his shake to help his poor momma out. I went inside and explained what I had done and asked to use a phone. The poor teenage kid working behind the counter took pity on me and handed me his cell phone. Luckily Danny was not on a call. He was at the station and had to drive home to get the spare set. Meanwhile, I stand outside the car and wait. I plead with Grant a few more times only to get the same sweet "no" followed by slurp slurp slurp. Then I hear a VROOOOM! Sure enough here comes my night in shining armor in. Dodge Charger topping the hill. PD 82 to save the day... Yet again!

School Starts Tomorrow

The time has come. School starts tomorrow. I sit here with tears. Tears of joy, pride, sadness and fear. I am so happy for Grant and this new chapter in his life and of course I am proud as a peacock of him. He is so smart, so funny, so handsome and so love able. I can't help but be a little sad, though. My baby is growing up. The baby and toddler years have gone. I am now the parent of a school boy - a Tannehill Brave. As any parent, and especially one of a special needs child, I am scared. Will his teachers understand him? Will the kids understand him? Will he be picked on or bullied? Will he make friends? Will he be able to let others know he understands?

So on this night here is my prayer:
Heavenly Father, thank you for choosing me to be Grants mom. He is a blessing beyond measure. I pray, be with him as he takes this new step. Give him courage. Give him confidence. Give him friends. Lord, help his teachers listen to what he has to say. Listen not only with their ears, but with their eyes and their sense of touch because Grant speaks with his.  Lord, let him learn great things. Let him spread his little wings. Let him grow. Lord, I pray you help me to step back so I may see him growing. Give me guidance to be the parent he so deserves. Amen!

Apraxia Awareness Day 2013

SO... TODAY IS THE FIRST EVER NATIONA APRAXIA OF SPEECH AWARENESS DAY!  What does that mean?  What is apraxia of speech?  It is a speech disorder where the signals from the brain get mixed up before getting to the muscles in the mouth and throat in order to form words.  The best analogy I have seen so far is the satellite signal in the rainstorm.  There is nothing wrong with the television station.  The signal leaves there just fine.  There is nothing wrong with your television.  The rain mixes the signal up.  There is nothing wrong with Grant's brain and there is nothing wrong with his mouth.  His signal is just mixed up.  Thank heavens it is something that he can overcome.  It will take a lot of speech therapy and practice at home.  He has made great strides since entering therapy, praise God.
     So what does this mean for Grant?  Well, imagine being in a classroom full of kids chattering up a storm.  You can understand them and want to respond, but your mouth won't make the words so easily as theirs.  You are hungry, thirsty, hurt, scared or mad but you can't find the words to tell anyone.  When someone asks your name or how old you are, you know the answer to both, you just can't say it.  You hear other kids, and adults too, asking what is wrong with you.  You just can't tell them "nothing.  I am a normal little boy who just wants to play.  I just can't get my mouth to do the right things."
     So what does this mean for me?  A roller coaster, to say the least!  I have this beautiful, smart, funny, energetic, ingenious little man that is the light of my life.  He is perfect because he is just the way that God made him, yet I can't get others to see that.  He is the problem child.  He is different.  He takes extra time.  I have news for those who don't/won't understand.  I will fight tooth and nail for this beautiful child.  I sit and listen to other parents telling stories of all the cute things their children have said, and I am jealous.  This disorder has robbed me of those moments with Grant.  I know he has stories he wants to tell me.  I can see it in his eyes, he just can't find the words.  There have been endless times that he has tried with all his might to tell me something and for the life of me I could not figure out what he was saying.  The disappointment in his eyes breaks my heart. I watch him in awe of his ingeniousness (is that a word).  When he is trying to tell me something and I don't understand, he will do his best to come up with another way to tell me. Even if it means making a monkey sound to tell me he wants to play with his barrell of monkeys in the bathtub.
     So, back to the beginning.  Today marks the first national awareness day.  I have worked to do my part to raise awareness, and I must say I am humbled.  I am blessed.  The amount of support I have received is overwhelming.  I have had to go back to the store TWICE to buy more supplies for ribbons.  At my last count I have made and handed out over 50!  Over 50 to support my precious boy! God is sooo good!

Wow... WHAT a day!

I sit here in the quiet house.  No noise but the clicking of the keyboard and the fish tank running, still trying to un-wind from the day.  It started out fairly normal.  I went to work.  We had a jury trial begin today, but nothing terribly exciting.  Then with a phone call everything changed.  Kim was to have an emergency C-section in Oklahoma City.  I arranged for a co-worker to fill in for me and I went out the door like a flash.  My Bear needed me... People often gig me about the way I drive.  I have been referred to as Mario Andretti (like another family member).  Well, let me tell you, there's benefits some times to that style of driving.  I made it to OKC in well, let's say record time.  I parked the car and ran in the hospital.  Found my way to Kim's room and she wasn't there.  They had already taken her into the operating room.  After going through two clerks at the desk (long story - one almost was assaulted) I found out it wasn't too late for me to go into surgery with Kim.  Justin was on his way, but wasn't going to make it in time.  I didn't want her to be alone so I dropped my purse, shucked my suit jacket, put on my bonnet, put the little paper suit on - backwards, mask on and booties on over my high hills and said "lets go".  God blessed me with the opportunity to sit and hold my Bear's hand and carress her face (AND scratch her nose) while the doctors and the nurses helped to bring my precious little nephew into this world.  What an amazing experience to hear his first little cries. The delivery was a little difficult, but he made it and they wisked him away to the NICU - auntie in tow.  I was able to witness this amazing little man demand so many people's attention as they tended to his needs.  WOW!  I am speechless.

I must admit, as I sat here tonight at home, holding my almost 5 year old baby boy, who weighs 33 pounds, I felt a little guilty.  I was holding my baby in my arms when my poor Bear hasn't even seen her baby much less had a chance to hold him. All in God's time.

God, give them both strength and THANK YOU for blessing me so richly with this day... AMEN