Dear Martha

Dear Martha,
     It is 3:30 a.m. On Christmas morning, and I should be sleeping. Instead, I sit wide awake with the events if last night going through my mind. I am mad. I am embarrassed, but mostly I am hurt.
     I remember visiting your house 15 years ago when Danny and I had just began dating. I remember the laughter and good times, and I couldn't wait to be a part of the Kelley family. A few short years later, my dream came true. It didn't take long, though for me to figure out this "amazing" family had flaws. I sat and watched how some members of the family were golden... chosen, while others barely garnered a half hug from you. When I inquired of this, the response I always received was "that's how it's always been". I sat and watched as you coddled those that have stolen from you time and again. Meanwhile others, who are kind hearted, hard working, and honest sat waiting on one thing: your love and attention. They sat quietly and watched as you showered the chosen ones with expensive gifts, never saying anything because "that's how it's always been".
     Fast forward a few more years. My son is born. A fifth generation William. I was so excited at the fact that he would get to know and have a close relationship with his great-grandparents as they lived right across the driveway. Then the cycle begins all over again. I go to the family reunion and watch you parade the newest chosen one around all the while my baby is barely acknowledged. I watch month after month as you dote on the chosen one, even traveling to another state to visit meanwhile you can't come across the driveway to visit my child. I do everything I know to help foster the relationship I so wanted Grant to have with his great grands, only to leave your house broken hearted, never saying anything because "that's how it's always been".
     Last night, for the third year in a row I sat and watched as you passed out gifts to the chosen ones while skipping over my son and yet again ignoring his questions of "where's mine".  To say I am hurt is an understatement. My heart is shattered. I cry for this child who never asks for or expects anything but to be loved like the others. I cry at the realization that my dream of him having a close relationship with great grandparents is never going to happen. AND, I cry for you.
     I cry for you because you have no damned clue what you are missing out on. You have grandchildren who are teachers, police officers, own their own semi, are fantastic athletes, and so on. But you can't see them for the successful, talented individuals they are. You care not to look past the chosen ones long enough to realize what an amazing family you have. Then there's Grant. Yes, he is "different", but if you would take a fraction of the time you have spent doting on the chosen ones, you would realize how simply amazing he is. He is very well mannered. He is silly and loves to make you laugh. He is so smart, even though he has a hard time expressing it. The one expression he has mastered, though is love. That boy has taught me love like I never imagined. He loves with every ounce of his being and beyond. His love can bring a smile to most anyone's face, and you are missing it! From this point forward, my child will be surrounded only by people who are willing to love him like he deserves to be loved. It's your loss, Martha, because I will not tolerate "that's how it's always been" any longer. My child, my husband, and many others deserve so much more.